She begins,
"All around us in modern Western society is evidence that elderly adults who cannot care for themselves on their own are being abused and neglected. I believe that much of this is a result of a general social disregard for this vulnerable population group. This broad disregard is such that many of them—especially those with disabilities and those living with chronic pain—would rather have their lives ended for them than go on living in a world where they perceive they are not valued."As a pastor one of my several duties was to visit the elderly in nursing homes. Frankly, I went there with mixed feelings. That is to say, it sometimes tore my heart out to see old, frail men and women sitting in wheelchairs with their heads hung low, spittle dripping out from their mouths as they mumbled unintelligible words or said nothing while they stared blankly with unseeing eyes at their surroundings. Was this all that awaits each one of us?
Of course, there are always those delightful, loving folks who welcome one's visits, the reading of God's Word and prayer. But what about those with disabilities, sickness, pain and suffering? I was tempted to avoid any contact with them even though it was my pastoral responsibility. These are the folks Ms. Holman speaks about as she asks the inevitable question. Why does our society, our culture in general, feel it is acceptable to devalue these people? She posits five answers.
1) Social Role Valorization - SRV is a concept coined by Dr. Wolf Wolfensberger. He calls it "the application of what science can tell us about the enablement, establishment, enhancement, maintenance, and/or defense of valued social roles for people" (Wolfensberger, 1995a). He says that in North America there are as many as ⅓ of the population who are devalued and subjected to systematic neglect and abuse. This is because they are perceived as different and deviant. Such would include people with physical or functional impairments or low competence. That would certainly include many of the elderly who are put away in some of the frightening nursing homes I have visited.
2) The tendency to "shoot" our weak and wounded. If evolution is your dominant view of the world that may fit in. Does the theory of evolution not say that the strong survive and the weak pass away? I certainly agree with Ms. Holman that this is the dominant way the business world works. A savvy CEO cannot afford to keep non-productive employees. He has to answer to the share holders who demand that the company makes money for them. So the elderly—crippled, diseased, with failing eyesight, hearing and memory—have got to go. What else can a thriving business do? This is how the world works.
3) Lack of compassion. I have certainly seen some deep commitments to elderly parents and relatives among many I have known. The closest that Sylvia and I came to dealing with this was when her polio-disabled aunt grew weak and elderly. We were the closest relatives and the responsibility to care for her fell upon us for several years. Yet I have known of an instance when elderly mother was considered a great burden—and the caretaker despised the task of caring for her. Both of them made life miserable for one another.
4) One's value is based on what one can contribute. Surely many of us know that caring for elderly parents is not always easy. Several senior citizens I've known were angry and frightened about getting old. Their arthritic pains increased their discomfort and they became demanding, complaining, troublesome people. They went out of their way to make everyone around them in the family feel their misery. Day after day they bemoaned their condition. When they died, their families sighed great sighs of relief. The only worth these people had in their eyes was the inheritances they left behind.
5) The U.S. is obsessed with youth. Indeed. You see it at every turn, in every ad, every magazine, every movie. Our children are worth fighting for, saving, helping, but the seniors—well, they've lived a "full life" and all they have to look forward to is more pain, more suffering and probably becoming a burden to their children. On the other hand, there are the young people. They are the future. They have the new ideas, the energy, the passion.
All this is rather dismal I know. Perhaps that's what Kitty Holman meant it to be when she made her comments. According to the Schadenberg blog you can contact her @ kitty.holman20@gmail.com . Perhaps she wants to shock us into more compassion. I've not seen that happen by making others feel guilty or angry. In my observation people learn compassion by example and the encouragement of God's mercy in Christ. Compassion comes from the heart of the one in whom the Spirit of Christ dwells, as the Apostle says,
We love because he first loved us. - 1Jo 4:19 ESVI'd like to explore this business of getting old further. One of the fascinating areas of study these days is that of discovering why we age in the first place. More on that another time.
